I-like-you-but-i'm-a-douchebag letter

Dear Ty,

     This is a love letter. So if you’re the kind of person who happens to hate reading love letters, you can throw this piece of trash into the shredder. I will not be offended.

     Otherwise if you get into this part, that means you have at least the tiniest interest – not in me but in reading this love letter.

     I hardly even noticed you when I saw you for the first time (it’s true you are not a head turner).  And to make the long story short, I began to like you when I saw you again. I don’t know what it is about you that I like. You’re not the best looking awardee in class yet, you’re not ugly to me. Sure, others would say it’s because you’re popular but hello!! I don’t even know you personally. My friends don’t know you or your existence at all (now they know because I told them all about you).

     You know what Ty, forget it. I don’t even know how to go on with this letter. It’s just that I feel like crap when I think of you. You got beautiful eyes and a smile that makes me want to kill myself. You are no superman. You could even be considered LARGE – which is so-not-my-type, but for me, you’re absolutely perfect. You’re not a song bird but I’d die listening to you when you speak than listening to my favorite song (Unintended by Muse). You don’t even need that wink-wink-nudge-nudge-and-perfect-grin effect that most handsome guys do just to draw me in. All of these make me want to wish that I should have never been born at all. I feel like I am not good enough to even look at you considering what and who I am. I might not have even the slightest right to think about you. I am a mess and it makes me feel bad.

     My friends told me that I can protest all I want but the truth is that when I talk about you, there’s that strange softness on my face and that look in my eyes that reflects an explosion of devotion within (I told them “whatever!”). They may be right.

     You might not like what I told you here (or you might not give a damn because you don’t know me at all) but Ty, with all due respect, I like you. I don’t even know if you’d be able to read this letter but I like you. I like you, despite everything. And saying it did a hell of a lot of good.

Love,

Me